Welcome to 2015, Hannah.
That's what I kept saying to myself as I kept checking my blog every so often, getting a pang of regret every single time I saw that my last post was last year in 2014.
When I think about 2014, I think about how challenging of a year it was. In hindsight and on a surface level, it was really great. At the same time, it was one of the most difficult times I'd ever been through spiritually. I'd struggled with a lot of busyness and self-doubt in my mind and in my heart, wondering what I was doing with my life and constantly trying to please everyone and be everything all at once. I really beat myself up when I failed and didn't consider those failings to be really who I was.
Then I remembered, early this year, that my identity is not found in what I do, what I like or even in my best of friends or my amazing family. These are all good things, but they're definitely not what make us who we are.
If you're a Christian, you find your identity in Christ.
What does that look like, though? It's easy to say we should put our identity in Christ, but it's harder to actually make it happen.
Here's the key: you can't.
Jesus wants us to be more like Him each and every day, and the only way we can do that is by following Him. By following Him and being in His presence, by choosing to do what most people wouldn't, and by faithfully sitting at His feet knowing that we have absolutely nothing outside of Him.
We find our identity in Christ not because we deserve it, but because He so graciously gives Himself to us over and over again. When He died on the cross for us and defeated death, He gave Himself up for us. And every day He's calling us to just sit at His feet and be. Still right there for us.
It doesn't mean we should use our screw-ups as an excuse to continue sinning, be lazy or do things half-heartedly, but it does mean that we shouldn't beat ourselves up over messing up. Jesus still loves us and wants to continue setting us apart from the world each and every day.
Here's one thing I try to remember when I still tend to want to please people or be "perfect".
Going through the motions doesn’t please You,
a flawless performance is nothing to You.
I learned God-worship
when my pride was shattered.
Heart-shattered lives ready for love
don’t for a moment escape God’s notice.
-- Psalm 51:16-17 (The Message) --
